Millennials are leaving the church, are they? Such is the bemoaning of the elders and the felt experience of their juniors. And as one of those juniors, I am not simply watching confusedly and sadly as millennials move toward the exits; I am watching my friends walk out the door.
This is deeply personal because faith and community are personal, but even more because the people leaving are, in fact, my people. People I grew up in the church and in youth group and in Sunday School with, went to school with, experienced the same cultural moment with; people I trust and who trust me; people that I depend on and understand in a way only those in a shared generation can. I have seen friends step away, slide away, sprint away from faith. Some have returned. Many have not.
The data are the data. About 6 in 10 millennials (59%) who were raised in the church have at some point left it. My assessment of the situation is not numerically different than any other generation; it is attitudinally different.
There is a difference between the institutional church (call it “organized religion”) and the looser, I-live-out-my-faith-and-encounter-Jesus-in-a-different-way kind of faith. For all generations, that difference is essential and there, but I believe it is more meaningful for younger generations because, in our world, the institutional church is not customary, not society-defining, not culturally “normal.”
The “spiritual but not religious” crowd is not hypothetical to us. It is not academic. It is not them.
It is us. Us as a generation. And if it is not exactly us as individuals, it is our friends and our friends of friends and the marketing we see and the hot-takes we hear.
Full disclosure: I am a church-attending, “spiritual and religious,” orthodox, millennial Christian. In many important ways, I believe and behave like American Christians a generation or two my senior. But my world is millennial.
I don’t bemoan it.
I don’t condemn it.
I don’t idolize it.
I live it.
And from my view, here are five phenomena I see as important markers of my generation’s faith.
1. Believing Without Institutionalizing
This is very common. Not only as it relates to faith, but in across a variety of segments of life, there is a desire to believe and to find meaning without attaching policies, regulation, hierarchies, gatekeepers, meetings, and geographies to those beliefs and searches for meaning.
In terms of faith, millennials grew up with rampant stories about church abuse, in the Catholic church but also among Protestants. We grew up with a very real and taught-in-schools postmodernism. We grew up with the idea that it was impossible to be a Christian and believe in evolution. We grew up with Left Behind, a shallow pop counter-culture, and a “purity culture” that joined lots of harm with a twisted good. And now we have grown up with Trump, and the strong equating of cold “conservative” politics with Christianity (at least evangelicalism). All those things have left scars.
I also think millennials, perhaps more than some other Americans, have a natural distrust of authority. Blame it on American individualism, the alleged “death of expertise,” and lying politicians, news media, and social media, but we are woefully and rightfully skeptical of authority, especially institutionalized authority, whether that be in Washington, in business, in the news, or in church.
These two factors—1) genuine harm associated with the church and 2) a high suspicion of leaders, including church leaders—have made church appear unattractive and even dangerous to many. The Trump era has massively exacerbated the religio-political damage, but lots of political changes, especially around sexual ethics, have made the church look to many as backward, anti-science, and unloving.
That being the case, many people just don’t want to be associated with the church, “Because look at all the harm it’s done…. Because then I’m assumed to be a homophobic bigot…. And anyway, I don’t need anyone to tell me what to believe. I can explore and practice my beliefs outside of ‘the system.’”
This line of thinking is pervasive. Some of it resonates with me too. It can be hard to “admit” to being a church-going Christian today because Americans in general, and especially the “woke” Left, are likely to make assumptions about my politics, that I dislike gay people and refugees, that I reject climate science, that I think sex is gross, that I may well be a patriarchal racist, and that I don’t think for myself. This description may be hyperbolic, but not by much. These thoughts are quite common, so even when millennials believe in God and have a relationship with Jesus, they are understandably reluctant to be associated with “the system” of “organized religion.”
I know a lot of millennials who would describe themselves as “spiritual but not religious.” They pray. They are mystical and are interested in the supernatural. They seek purpose and believe in God. They might even describe themselves as Christians and hold to orthodox Christian beliefs about Jesus and salvation. They simply don’t want to be affiliated with an institutional church. And until the Holy Spirit and his church convinces them that the risks of church are worth the rewards, or that the local church can do things that personal exploration and social engagement can’t, or that church-as-institution is essential rather than extraneous, this “belief without institutions” model will not retreat.
2. Disbelieving and Normalizing
Until the last few decades, going to church in America was “normal” behavior. Whether a person believed or not, there was a social pressure to adhere to traditional cultural norms, like going to church. And even if there wasn’t pressure to attend church, such attendance wasn’t considered bizarre. That is changing.
Now, going to church is the weird thing to do. For the reasons listed in point 1, church attendance is something you have to justify to others. Inviting someone to church may always have been awkward (Question for older readers: Was it awkward for you to invite people to church?), but now it is a bold move. By an increasing number, it is even considered inappropriate, because going to church is not considered normal. (Note: This is my experience among urban millennials in the North; my Southern friends tell me going to church is still a social norm there, though is often more about nominal Christianity than transformative, relationship-with-Jesus Christianity).
Because there is no longer any pressure to go to church in our culture, and in fact there is a growing cultural pressure to not go to church (for some of the reasons noted above), now, for people who don’t believe but attended church anyway as a cultural thing, there is zero incentive to go. So, for Americans in general, but perhaps especially younger Americans, it is just very easy to not go to church. You are “normal” and “healthy” and “on trend” if you don’t go. And if you do go, you need to be able to explain yourself.
Maybe 50 years ago, our culture said you needed a good excuse to not go to church; now it says you need a good excuse to go. It used to say going to church was a social and moral good; now it is a social and moral bad. Clearly, the fact that the church is the largest and most generous source of social and moral good in the world is being lost on people, but that is exactly the point.
So, while all through history and especially the later decades of the 20th century, plenty of people attended church because that’s what they were “supposed to do,” and not because they truly had personal, life-changing faith (e.g., they were not actually Christians, except in name), now all those people are leaving. In a very real sense, the “droves” of people leaving the church represent a sad reality that the church is losing some people who would be faithful Christians, but is more losing people who were never really Christians at all. A sad, but I think real, way of viewing this is that the church is losing lots of “attendees,” but not a ton of Christians.
3. Nones Are Not Nothing
Millennials identify as religious “nones” at a higher rate than any generation before them. For some, that means they are outright atheists, but for many more it means they are agnostic or simply don’t want to affiliate with a religious group. What is interesting is that American “nones” actually hold more orthodox religious beliefs that many self-identifying Christians in Europe (I wrote an article about this for Christianity Today last year).
I’m not sure if this says something hopeful about American nones or just something sad about European Christians, but it suggests that even among Americans who don’t associate or actively disassociate with organized religion (many of whom are millennials), they remain strangely spiritual or even religious. Here are some stats from the article I wrote.
- 27 percent of American nones say they believe in God with absolute certainty; only 23 percent of Western European Christians say the same.
- 13 percent of American nones say religion is “very important” in their lives; only 14 percent of Western European Christians say the same.
- 20 percent of American nones say they pray daily; only 18 percent of Western European Christians say the same.
4. Not All Churches
Evangelical churches are actually holding steady in terms of numbers, though some denominations have taken hits. Mainline Protestants and the Catholic church are seeing higher drop-out rates. Charismatic churches are actually growing.
I have plenty of friends gravitating toward theologically rich, Bible-rooted, Holy-Spirit-filled charismatic churches. In my view, seriously committed millennial Christians, increasingly want 1) more charismatic church and/or 2) more high church (liturgy, theological depth), and are 3) more willing to see that Christianity does not equal political conservatism. Here again I am speaking from what I see and experience in the urban North. This may not resonate in rural areas or some parts of the American South.
While it seems clear that millennials are leaving church in a significant way, this doesn’t apply to all churches—and some churches are even growing. To my eyes, admittedly limited in view and not without blindspots, Pentecostal/charismatic churches are growing among millennials because they hunger for spiritual experience; crave spiritual, intellectual, and emotional intimacy with God and people; believe that if Christianity is true we should expect to see supernatural things; and because of Christian pop culture phenomena like Bethel, Hillsong, and Elevation churches, which dominate the worship music scene across the western church. Episcopal, Catholic, and even Eastern Orthodox churches are in some ways becoming more popular among educated millennials because they are liturgical, are rich with symbolism and history, and, at least for the Episcopals, they are politically progressive. I also wonder if Reformed churches are growing, or are poised to grow, because they are theologically very robust, have a strong social ethic, and don’t shy away from the hard spiritual and political questions that may plague some other denominations.
5. Not All Bad
I think what is happening among millennials and the church is sad. I think millennials are leaving the church in large numbers, even if they aren’t all leaving Christianity outright. I think the church need to be more nimble, not changing its gospel beliefs, of course, but making a deliberate effort to separate itself from the current wave of Trumpian politics (this is not necessarily the same as separating from conservative ideals) and make explicit atonement for and strong effort away from the many hurts of the millennial experience (e.g., abuse of many kinds, bad politics, unhelpful ideas around sex, gender, race, and other faiths). Going forward, there will continue to be need for a wide variety of churches, but deep and durable theology, vulnerable leadership, intimate community, “humble confidence,” and more spiritual experience (as opposed to just intellectual faith) will be welcome.
There is a lot that looks bleak, but I see a strong silver lining. Because going to church is becoming harder to do in American society, it will only be the genuine, committed, Christ-following Christians who remain. To go to church, to express faith publicly, will require strength and boldness and communion with God. So while the church may get smaller in number, it is and will get stronger, more devoted, and therefore be a better witness of the transformative work of the gospel.
Millennial Christians will need to know what they believe and why, and it will require an increased level of devotion and seriousness, because the division between us and the culture will be starker and more consequential. It will be harder to be a Christian, and that means we will need to be more dependent on God, which is always a good thing. I don’t believe the American church is or will soon be persecuted in the same way as churches in, say, the Middle East or China, divisions around faith will grow harsher, but we know the persecuted church is often the strongest church.
It will cost more and more to be a Christian in America. There will no longer be a category for “cultural Christianity,” because the church will be a very obvious counter-culture. Which is what it is meant to be. The church should look different than the world. If the church is going to keep being the Church (as opposed to a political tool or a social club), it will have no choice.
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